I must really be crazy. Not only am I going to participate in Poetic Asides’ 2009 November PAD Challenge, I, on impulse (surprise, surprise) decided to participate in National Blog Posting Month (NaBloPoMo) this year for the first time. They even provide you with a nifty little widget you can put in your sidebar (hint: scroll down ).

Like the Poem-A-Day Challenge last April in which I participated, Poetic Asides will post a prompt for each day in November, and you’re required to write a poem that corresponds to it. Unlike April’s PAD, I will not be submitting my poems to the Chapbook Contest. I’m merely utilizing this event as a way to generate poems. Hey, it worked in April. The nice thing was that you didn’t have to keep up with each day’s prompt — you could write all 30 poems on April 30th, as long as you submitted them by the deadline. I imagine it will be the same this month.

NaBloPoMo doesn’t work that way. You have to write a blog post each day of November. They don’t provide blogosphere-wide prompts, although some members will suggest prompts that are just that — suggestions. I don’t honestly know if I’ll be able to complete this because my priority will be the poetry writing.

Many of the poems from my thesis are good, but I’m not satisfied with it as a manuscript. My long-term goal is to write enough poems that I can put together into a decent manuscript, but for now, I need to write poems.

So, it begins.

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good, is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian. — Dennis Wholey (via Quote Book)

Last spring I participated in Poetic Asides‘s April Poem-A-Day Challenge 2009. They have yet to announce the people who managed to complete the challenge, let alone which poems will be published in the e-book compiling the best poem for each of April’s 30 days, both of which were supposed to be made known in early June, then July, then August, etc. They have, however, recently announced the Challenge’s Poet Laureate. The person who received that honor also volunteered to read the slush pile (submissions).

If I knew that would increase my chances, I would’ve volunteered, too (not really). I certainly have the experience, having read for The Ohio State University Press/The Journal Award in Poetry during my tenure in the MFA program. Maybe I’m being sour grapes, but seriously, does that seem fair? Then again, life isn’t fair, so whatever. Besides, I personally know editors at a few literary journals, which also isn’t fair but comes with the territory (of having been in an MFA program, being a member of AWP, etc.).

Next month their November 2009 Chapbook Challenge commences. A chapbook is a small book of 10 – 20 poems. However, it isn’t like a book of poetry, which usually consists of at least 48 pages and has an ISBN number — you know, like the kind you see in a store. I’m not even sure if you can purchase a chapbook or simply ask the poet for one of his/hers. But that’s beside the point. I am going to participate in that I’ll write a poem for each day of November. However, I won’t be posting them to their site nor submitting them for the chapbook contest. I figure it’s a good way to generate more poems because they’ll offer a daily prompt, which I find helpful.

In other news, I recently sent an electronic (e-mail) submission of 5 poems to a literary journal and will mail a submission of 6 different poems to another journal tomorrow. Let my writing career begin! (Again. )

I completed Poetics Aside’s April Poem-A-Day Challenge 2009, having written 30 poems in the last 30 days. I’m exhausted both mentally and physically (more on that in a few days — it’s my sprained ankle, basically). I set out to write at least 5 poems, and I wrote 6 times that number. Yay!!!

So as some of you know, when I started out doing this PAD Challenge, my goal was to write 5-10 poems. If I’m able to continue at my pace, I’ll have written a total of 30 in 5 more days. It seems like forever since I posted about reaching my goal of 5. Then 15 or 16.

It’s a weird feeling. I feel elated and yet…I don’t know…[insert negative emotion here] at the same time. It especially doesn’t make sense because I can’t put my finger on what that negative feeling is. Maybe a bit of disgust at not having written in so long, and blaming the ECT for it (though I’m positive that, the anxiety, and the depression didn’t/don’t help)? Completely cutting myself off, deliberately, from my former literary circle from shame, maybe? Or maybe because I’m not totally well yet?

OK, enough. I’m doing exactly what I recently mentioned that my therapist is trying to get me not to do: not give myself credit for the work I’ve done. And for me, that work isn’t just the writing but the steps I’ve taken to get to this point. To write again. Blah blah. I don’t want to sound cheesy.

Anyway, I’m slowly beginning to be a part of that circle of writers again. I even joined AWP, of which I haven’t been a member for about 6 years. I don’t know how they got my current address, but when I got the notice in the mail, I took that as a sign.

What I want to know is why I’m an ottava rima?

I’ve surpassed my goal of writing 5-10 poems for the PAD Challenge and have written 16, which includes today’s prompt. On 4 out of the past 5 days I was able to write and submit poems on the same day the prompt was posted. I’m feeling pretty good about myself: I’m writing again — I can’t remember the last time I wrote a poem — maybe 7 years? And now I have 16. They aren’t all great; I mean, this challenge is more about quantity than quality, to just get yourself to write. After all the trouble I’ve had writing anything creative these past few years, this is working.

Yesterday’s prompt is to take the title of another poet’s poem, alter it, and use it as the title for your own poem, though you don’t have to write it in the same style as the original. Mine’s called “Barber at the Green Mill,” which I did style after the original, but in my own way. (Patricia Barber is a Chicago jazz pianist/vocalist who usually plays Monday nights at the Green Mill.) I won’t post mine here, but here’s the poem I chose to switch up the title. Anyone who may think they don’t understand poetry, I hope, will be surprised.

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