Alchera Project #37: How to Spot a Barb
List/Option No. Four - Project 37 - Other Submissions
This month is going to deal with astrology. Whether you believe in it or not will be irrelevant as this is more about personalities than lions, scorpions and bulls. eHow.com has a collection of "How to Spot a <Insert Astrological Sign Here>" articles. Each article points out the most common characteristics of each sign. Your first objective is to gather the characteristics of your sign in a list and explain, in little or full detail, whether or not it applies to you and why it does or doesn’t; also mention if you’re proud of the characteristic or perhaps ashamed or embarassed. The second objective is to read through the other signs and find out if you think there is one that is more suiting to your personality. Do the same list as you did with your actual sign. The third and fourth lists are completely optional–the third list involves going through every single sign and making the same lists you did with the first two (which characteristics apply to you and which do not); the fourth involves making a personalized "How to Spot a <Insert Astrological Sign Here>" article using characteristics from the other signs. You should not make up your own characteristics–they should all come from the articles.
Part 1: My True Sign
How to Spot a Cancer
Cancers, symbolized by the Crab and born between June 22 and July 22, are deeply emotional people with an intense need for both romance and security.
Steps
1. Seek out pack rats. Cancers form emotional bonds with everything that
crosses their paths. Often unable to throw anything away, they can
frequently be found hoarding such valuable treasures as a pair of gym
shorts from junior high.
i definitely have pack rat tendencies. however, i absolutely can’t stand it, so i throw away as much as possible. or maybe i’ve learned to ask myself whether or not i really want to keep something. i’m trying not to place so much attachment on things.
2. Notice those who
have a strong relationship with their parents and immediate family. A
friend who places a high value on familial bonds is likely to have been
born under the sign of Cancer.
i’m not so sure about this one. Brian once described my immediate family as really close even though we don’t get along. i think that we all get along with each other except with my mother. my sister and i are pretty close, talk/e-mail/chat almost every day or several times a day. we live in Chicago. my brother lives in Texas and we don’t talk often, but we e-mail each other once in a while and he sends lots of pictures. i talk to my dad, who lives in Vegas, once every week or two, and not at all to my mom, who also lives in Chicago.
3. Look for highly volatile emotions ranging from impenetrable sadness to overwhelming joy. Cancers wear their hearts on their sleeves, and their emotions can change from one moment to the next.
since i’ve been on a mood stabilizer, i don’t think the depths of my emotions are quite so intense. i still feel them, obviously, but not overwhelmingly so. however, there still seems to be some rapid cycling, so yeah, i can be ecstatic one moment and utterly miserable the next.
4. Watch for poets, novelists and musicians. These are the types of professions that Cancers gravitate toward.
oh, brother. well, i did get an MFA in creative writing with a concentration in poetry. and i majored in music in high school (an arts academy) and in my first year in college. i also played in bands for a while.
5. Think about acquaintances that typically spend their time at home. Cancers love to be within the secure boundaries of their own abode, and can often be found nestled under the covers reading a favorite novel.
this is very true of me, but sometimes i go overboard and tend to isolate. for the most part, i’m very happy to just stay home and read a book. it wasn’t always this way, though. i used to be a serious, serious party girl.
6. Focus on those who have chosen professions as caretakers, nurses or nannies. Cancers feel an innate need to coddle those around them and provide the security that they themselves desire.
i don’t like taking care of others. well, unless they’re animals. i don’t mind if people want to take care of me, though. i have a hard time taking care of myself.
Tips
- Cancers are most compatibly paired with people born under the signs of Virgo, Scorpio, Pisces and Taurus.
If a Cancer friend of yours disappears for a few days at a time, do not be alarmed. These introspective beings often feel the need to burrow into a dark corner and be alone once in a while. this is funny, but true. i do sometimes disappear and want nothing to do with anyone, or keep them at a distance.
Warnings
- Be careful of the dynamic nature of the Cancer’s emotions. Most of us tend to take on the emotions that Cancers display without even knowing it.
Part 2: The Sign I Fit
How to Spot a Gemini
Geminis are symbolized by the Twins, which represent the truly enigmatic quality of these individuals born between May 21 and June 21. These dual-minded beings may be difficult to tie down, but persevere and you will reap the benefits of a sharp wit and a finely tuned mind.
Steps
1. Pay attention to fellow revelers at cocktail parties, office functions and clubs. The Gemini in the room will make conversation with absolutely everyone and will consistently delight others with witticisms and offbeat remarks.
people don’t believe me, but i used to be very, very shy. now, i think, i tend to overcompensate. what can i say? i’m just so charming. lol
2. Pay attention to those who tend to be in the limelight. While Geminis are not conniving or selfish, they instinctually enjoy being the center of attention and will often gravitate towards situations that will allow them to be there.
i love being the center of attention. maybe it’s because i was an only child for the first 8 years of my life, and the only grandchild for the first 7. i loved performing on stage as a musician, and teaching certainly has a performative aspect to it. at least if you want to keep the students’ attention in good ole’ freshman comp.
3. Watch those who seem to have many unfinished projects in their life. A Gemini feels the need to be involved in a multitude of creative endeavors at all times, and subsequently has trouble finishing projects of any magnitude.
this is me totally. i get these brilliant ideas and inspirations and start them and never finish. or rarely finish. i’m bad on following through. it’s very difficult for me. i’m surprised that i’m actually working on this project right now and intend on finishing it.
4. Notice the eyes and the manner of speaking. Geminis tend to contain an alert, electrical quality and often speak fast and furious in an attempt to keep up with their quick minds.
when i start talking fast, it’s usually a sign of an impending manic episode.
5. Talk to those around you and focus on their communicative skills. If you find someone who gives you the weather report, coupled with beauty tips and a quick-witted political analysis, you’ve found your Gemini!
i can give you that.
6. Avoid looking for Geminis among introspective, emotional creatures. While Geminis contain their fair share of emotion, they tend to choose intellect over matters of the heart and will rarely emit sadness or joy in social situations.
no, i think i’m a bit of both in this case.
Tips
Geminis tend to be most compatible with Leos, Libras, Aquarians and Arians.
Warnings
Beware a romantic relationship with a Gemini unless you have a trusting demeanor. While not necessarily disloyal, Geminis are known for their restless nature and flirtatious manner. Keep your Gemini intrigued at all times, and you will keep your Gemini forever.
Part 4: How to Spot a Barb
Steps
1. Think about acquaintances that typically spend their time at home. Barbs love to be within the secure boundaries of their own abode, and can often be found nestled under the covers reading a favorite novel. (Cancer)
2. Notice those who are extremely generous with their funds. Barbs often pick up the dinner tab, rent a fancy car to impress a date, or purchase a rare collectible gift on credit to wow a friend or romantic interest. (Leo)
3. Ask several people for tax help, plumbing assistance or a grammar lesson. The one who jumps at the chance to lend his or her hand may very well be the Barb in the room. (Virgo)
4. Go shopping. Notice who takes the most time to decide on a purchase. A Barb shopper can vacillate for hours between the blue sweater and the black one, simply unable to choose one over the other. (Libra)
5. Look for fellow humans who are diverse and broad-minded. Barbs tend to explore a variety of activities, hobbies and viewpoints throughout their lifetime. (Sagittarius)
6. Look for those with a keen sense of humor, and the ability to laugh in almost any circumstance. (Capricorn)
7. Watch for rebellious, independent individuals who would rather leave this earth all together than be tied down by rules and rigidity. (Aquarius)
8. Look for individuals who contain a variety of strong characteristics. A Barb may be quick-witted while at the same time melancholy; sensitive while also strong. (Pisces)
9. Watch those who seem to have many unfinished projects in their life. A Barb feels the need to be involved in a multitude of creative endeavors at all times, and subsequently has trouble finishing projects of any magnitude. (Gemini)
Tips
If a Barb friend of yours disappears for a few days at a time, do not be alarmed. These introspective beings often feel the need to burrow into a dark corner and be alone once in a while. (Cancer)
Warnings
- Think twice before you insult or question a Barb. These prideful beings can quickly become angered if they feel that they are not being treated as royalty. (Leo)
- Be warned of the seductive qualities of Barbs. They can captivate you with their charms like charmer woos a snake. (Libra)
- Be very careful with the way you phrase your words, lest you insult these delicate beings! (Scorpio)
- Beware the flighty characteristics of the Barb. One minute you may think you’ve got one pegged and the next you’ll be left alone wondering where he or she went! (Aquarius)
- Be wary of classifying the Barb in your life as sluggish or lazy. Barbs are extremely focused once they have found a passion. It is only without a goal that they appear to be without a work ethic. (Taurus)
On Writing
